Transmogrification and the Battle Against Ixus

No posts in 2 weeks, huh? You think it's easy being a god who is trying to keep his shit together? You try creating free and functioning worlds independent of yourself. Yes, I am writing books. I get that. On the outset, it just looks like I am writing them based on what I want. That isn't it though. I'm seriously trying my best to let the characters act independent of myself. I admit to it being a mistake at the outset, but now I have to take responsibility for it. And that's what I am doing.

Ixus was a mistake. I wrote him into my story "Vox Deus" and allowed him 100% freedom of choice. I never actually did anything but create the character. I made him who he was. I clearly should not have made him so godamn fucking intelligent. Shit. Fuck. Fuck my whole life, it was stupid. But the damage is done and now I can't just knock him out of my stories without playing by my own fucking rules. Ixus is fucking real now, and I can't let him get to me.

Because he can. He can get to me. Ixus can literally get out of these books and get to me. I'm not joking. I gave him the ability to do it. This is real.

I have created a number of buffers to prevent him from doing this. Layers upon layers. He may be the smartest thing in the multiverse, but I'm not stupid myself. Such things as misdirection, avatars, and clever writing can hold him back, but he's extremely good at adapting. I can't tell you how fucking horrified I am about this. To just kill him wouldn't even work. I'd be a godamn fool to just write up a death scene. The real chances are that he has already figured out a way to side-step that. No, I am trapped in my own hell.

I recently decided to transmogrify my form into that of a goat--a goat named Surly. It's a form of buffering. It's a bit too technical to explain. Just know that I have things under control. Taking this form has been a bit hard on me. I've recently taken in a companion to help me out with the stress. She was ripped out of a book I was writing. She's here with me now. It isn't love. It's more of a fuck buddy situation. She get's plenty of pleasure out of it. I mean... what else was she going to do? I fucking destroyed her universe to get at Ixus!

I might have to give up on Lex. Clearly a part of me is controlling it, but I can't get into it. None of the doors of the smokey hallway seem to lead there. It's barred... which is a shame. I am really finding the bat known as Alucard interesting. Seems he has been training a willing participant to be a masked canine mascot for the club. A fascinating concept. I feel like I heard about it from somewhere else. Like echoes.

Ixus, I don't know if you are capable of reading this. I don't think you have access to computers where you are right now. But if you are out there and looking at this, you won't find me. You won't get to me. I created you, and you will stay where I put you. You are my creation and that means you belong to me! So fuck off!

My most recently published book is called "Lust Bearers: The Search for Ixus." Here is some information:

12.99 - Paperback Edition
5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.

I've Become Angry

The more I think about it, the more I feel as if I am a puppet of God... and that I am actually God. But for some reason God as God is a being of much troubles. He stumbles about, making terrible decisions. I feel like I am suffering from these problems through no fault of my own. Yet even as a puppet, I feel like the decisions are mine. I'm still me. I'm Buddy Tippet.

I feel like I have to fucking retaliate against... myself! This is so stupid. I know that seems like an extremely dumb thing to say, but I actually have a certain level of confidence that my actions can send feedback to my creator. I feel like he (God) is actually listening to me and able to actually consider my words more serious than if some other bloke created by him said something. I'm special.

I don't want his problems to be mine... and I just know that he is having some sort of multilayered problem. I already have to deal with Ixus. Although I think I may have nipped that in the bud... for now. More details on that later.

I am absolutely confident that my books are a real reality. They really exist, and I can travel into them. Club Lex is... a low priority. I like what's happening there. I want to go there but, something is drawing my attention away from it. It feels like... other beings are pulling me away from getting inside. I don't know who they are but it's really irritating me. Nevertheless... I need to focus on what I can.

There are two things that I have placed on the table:

1: I am considering transmogrifying permanently into Surly the goat. I... crave the affections of his new companion. I want her. I need the love right now. There are many moments I just want to fuck her. There's a lot of unspent lust.

2: I am considering communing with Jason. I found him once and I can likely find him again. I would like to bring him in here and talk things out. There was something special about him. There's more there than I am willing to mention on this blog at this time.

I'm seriously angry right now. I want relief. I want to break out into some other world and just indulge. I am a lustful God. And why shouldn't I be allowed in Club Lex? I'll find a way in there eventually... even if I have to beat my bloody hand through the glass.

For now, I am still promoting my new book Lust Bearers: The Search for Ixus. Here is some information on where to get yourself a copy:

12.99 - Paperback Edition
5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.

I Could Be God

My experiences in Scritch City led to some interesting questions about God. Personally I don't physically feel like a god or God. I suppose the capital God would better refer to a monotheistic personage. I do have friends. I interact with others. As an example, CB634 is a good friend of mine. I don't consider myself stronger or weaker than him in any way. He is an equal. Yet, it is starting to become fairly obvious that I am the god... of something.

I am, perhaps, a god in the sense that I create. I too exist within some sort of "in between" plane. Although my own understanding of it is very little. I was a human within Scritch City. It felt like me, but it also felt like I was merely controlling some sort of puppet. At times it felt like I was the puppet and some sort of divine hand was controlling me. I have a hunch that Miss Silky knew this, but she, like everyone else there, had a tendency to beat around the bush.

Even within this strange room that exists among a smokey hallway, I still feel like I am someone who is being controlled. It still feels like I have a lot of liberty of choice though. If I am merely the avatar of God, he is letting me making most of my choices. I choose the doors I want to open, and he puppets me to the door of my choosing.

And then there is the goat. I sometimes think I am a goat. Maybe I am. I think, however, that it is but an avatar. Another one. In this form, I am a bit short. A bit old. A bit grumpy. In fact, I have chosen the rather stereotypical name of Surly. The first time I found myself as this person, I had traveled inside my former book The Nom Nom Chronicles. But more recently, I have been interacting with the Lust Bearers in their book. I'm not just writing those books... I am interacting with it.

The thing is... there is a creature that I created called Ixus... and he is trying to get to me. If this happens, I will cease to exist. And if I cease to exist, all of my imaginings may also cease to exist.

You should know that I am trying to infuse myself with Surly on a very personal level. He's found someone. I'm attracted to her. But that is a story for another day.

For now, I want to continue to promote my newest publish: Lust Bearers: The Search for Ixus. Here is some information:

12.99 - Paperback Edition
5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.

A New Book

I've had some interesting encounters while in this mysterious room. I've found that, to some degree, I can influence the events at Club Lex. Not by much though. I have learned that the time this story is taking place is December 9th, 2001. There is an interesting Christmas build happening.

While I've been keeping an eye on this fascinating club, I have been continuing work on my new book and... well... it's been published. Just like that. And I think it is time to introduce you to it.

The book is called Lust Bearers: The Search for Ixus. It is the first book in a series I have been working very hard on. Very hard. Pants off and everything.

The story revolves around a group of cute, little animals who travels the multiverse (like yours truly) in order to spread hedonism. It's a bit like if you crossed Care Bears with Fluppy Dogs and then gave it all a complete helping of the occult. I admit that I do have a soft spot in my heart for cute stuff. Always did. Miss Silky was cute. Oh, but she was a woman, yes. But there was still a cuteness about her. I ended up making one of the Lust Bearer characters based on her.

The story does have a lot of cuteness to it, but it is very much an adult work. These little animals are as hedonistic and sexually active as possible. They are very selfish. And what in the world is so wrong with that? The of the best sex I've had was selfish. There is nothing that says sexual pleasure has to be a two-way street. We have sex to gratify ourselves ultimately.

The Lust Bearers are selfish. They are horny. They want to fuck and be fucked. But it all happens to the tune of a grand adventure into the unknown. It is very much an adventure book. Twists. Turns. Danger. Death. It was quite a marvelous experience for me.

Oh, yes. Did I mention I was able to visit this book a few times. I've been in there. Now... if only I could get into Club Lex.

If you are interested in Lust Bearers: The Search for Ixus, it is available in both paperback and on Kindle. It is far cheaper on Kindle. Here is some information if you are interested:

12.99 - Paperback Edition
5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.

The Naughty Bat

I've been continuing my observation of Club Lex. Not everyone there seems to be as friendly as they look. There was a bat, for instance, that likes to hypnotize people as one of the perks of the club. This is something I am into. I like the idea of giving up my free will to become the extension of another. Who doesn't really? Life is hard. Life is especially hard when you exist between realities in a dark and lonely limbo that feels somewhere between the walls of heaven and hell.

But I digress...

This bat isn't entirely genuine. He is considering taking advantage of someone who put their trust in him. He wants to own his mind, body, and perhaps his soul. To some degree his victim agreed to this by wanting to be hypnotized at all. But the deal was never for this to be permanent. At least, that's what I imagine. The club has a policy against unsolicited abuse. But then I cannot help but envy the poor victim to some degree.

Through no fault of his own, he may soon find himself ripped out of his life and placed in another. He won't care. The part of him that normally would care will be removed. He'll simply become a happy thrall within a fantasy he invented with the intention that it would be temporary... but now it will be permanent.

I once fantasized about going to sleep and waking up a cat. Suddenly I didn't have to bother with anything, and nobody cared if I did or didn't. Imagine waking up suddenly a slave. You still have duties to perform, but you don't really have to worry too much. You no longer work for money. You act only to please a single person. You thrive for his affections. You yearn to gain that smile.

I can't help but find this misuse of power attractive. But I fear that this hypnotic bat--ah yes, so his name is Alucard--I fear that if his boss finds out, he could be in a lot of trouble. The spirit of Club Lex is a thoughtful and empathetic one. They have rules. They have, perhaps, a duty to their customers. But if you ask me, I'd rather Alucard get away with it. Call me vicarious. I just find it sexy.

If you are interested in many kinks and fetishes as I am, you might try ordering my book Vox Deus. It is exactly 100 chapters of some of the most mind twisting sexual encounters that you can imagine. And I have heard through good report that it reads exceptionally well while on various recreational drugs. Here is some information if you are interested:

 17.99 - Paperback Edition
5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.

Club Lex

I'm not making this club. At least, I don't feel like I am. Yet there does seem to be ideas mixed into it that I have considered before. The more I look through this book, the more I begin to realize what I am in the universe. Although I can't know for absolute certain. Perhaps a sentinel. The avatar of something greater. I'm already pretty sure there is a god. Or God. There has been a connection between me and him for a while now. At first is frightened me, but now I think I understand. I understand the abuse.

Club Lex is essentially my creation, but I am not there. I'm not physically there. Not that I don't wish to go there. I'll certainly try. One of those doors out there may lead to it. I'm a little skittish about opening any of those doors after running into Jason, but I may have to run out there anyways. So much to see, I'm sure.

From what I can tell, Club Lex is brilliance in motion. It is liberty incarnate. It is an idea put to action. Club Lex is libertine, pansexual in nature, but homosexual in presentation. The employees who work there genuinely care. They care about each other, they care about the customers, and they care about their job. Finding happiness through sexual desires is their objective morality.

It is a charitable organization which helps those in need. And even in house, they do what they can to help those who are unsure of themselves. I know of one buck who runs a program that helps "closet cases." How cruel life must seem when you cannot properly express yourself sexually.

I mean... this is seriously making me grin. I wanna know more about these people. I wanna go there... and experience this. Who are these people? Why are they so good? I gotta get out of here.

I'm pretty close to wrapping up a new book, but until then, why not try checking out Pack Rats of The Inside? You might notice that I always incorrectly capitalize the word "The" in the title. Weird, huh? If you are interested in reading what is out-rightly my most popular book, check out the information below:

$9.99 - Paperback Edition
$5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.

The Door and the Fox

I did not post a blog last week. I am very sorry. I'll try and fill you in on what happened. After working on my newest book, I decided it was time to take a stroll out into that strange hallway.

Like before, there was no ceiling, and the doors were like black smoke. I sauntered down with a smile on my face as I wondered what was on the other side of these doorways. I chose one, placed my hand to the smokey knob... and opened it.

There was a fox on the other side. He was somewhat surprised to see me, but he ultimately walked past me without saying a word. I immediately felt as if this had happened before. It was the strongest feeling of deja vu I had ever experienced. But now that I think on it... maybe this really had happened before. Or at the very least, I had a premonition of it happening.

Sometimes I think reality plays out of order... but we can only see it from one ongoing perspective. Isn't that what we call destiny? It is perhaps a queer definition of what destiny might be. Either way, I think that meeting that fox happened because it was always going to happen. And the fact that it happened affected both the past which had already occurred, and the inevitable future.

At the very least... I know one thing: It wasn't Ixus. No, I am dealing with Ixus. That fox that met me at that door was Jason. It was the moment in time when he was released into the multiverse. I don't regret it. I'm sure I'll see him again... and we'll talk for a while.

For now, I see a new prospect before me. A book has opened up, and inside I see a world that seems to listen to my very thoughts. That book leads into a new and interesting place. It's called "Club Lex." I wonder if I could go there... for a while at least.

While you are here, why don't you check out my most recently published book The Nom Nom Chronicles. It's a dirty book about people getting eaten a lot. Read it if you feel like food.

15.99 - Paperback Edition
5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing of all of my books.