Falling. Icey cold sensations passing through his fingertips. Blood. A steely acceptance of fate. These sensations were felt as the falling continued. Icey mountains flew past, flinging themselves upwards into the misty sky. No ground below. Nothing in the sky. Just falling and cold.
The sound of a door. Click-clack slam! A rush of wood flies past the senses. A sudden change in temperature. Gravity. Ground. Wind. Sand. Blood. Confusion. And then... loneliness.
* * * * *
Jason marched through the endless desert of Zed with five little creatures called Lust Beaers trailing after him. Each of the little ones wore circlets upon their heads with little symbols upon them.
"Well, we're here again," said Eager Ears Fennec whose circlet bore the symbol of a double arrow. "Not that I've personally been here before, but Sly's been here before. I'd rather gets out of here as soon as we can though. This is the place we banished Ixus to."
"Ixus is contained," said Jason.
"Are we sure of that?" asked Lewd Ideas Kangaroo. His circlet had a symbol made of of three sperms. "If I see him, I can still kick the crap out of him."
"You would fail," remarked Jason coldly as he stepped through the sand. He only briefly looked back at the bold kangaroo through his dark sunglasses.
"He's probably right," said Eager. "Any sight of Ixus or Dresden means we need to go in the opposite direction."
Kinky Fix Raccoon, whose circlet bore the symbol of a triskelion, angrily said, "I'm about this close to just setting Ixus free on the whole fucking multiverse. I'm not gonna be happy until we find out where Stinky Ass Skunk is."
"He's just lost," said Eager Ears.
"I want him back," growled the raccoon. "I fucking loved him."
"I'm hungry," said Glutton Party Rat who had the symbol of a stack of pancakes on his circlet.
"Then suck my dick!" shouted Kinky angrily.
Although he seemed a little interested, the rat continued to complain, "I didn't have time to eat before we left Scritch City. I feel like I'm dying."
"Then eat cum, faggot," said Kinky Fix, grabbing Glutton by his hair.
Eager Ears yelled, "Cut it out, you stupid fucks! We're in Zed right now! Also Glutton is our key bearer! He'll find a doorway easier if he's hungry!"
"Quiet," said Jason calmly.
Eager held up a paw to halt her party. Kinky pushed Glutton away and crossed his arms with aggravation. Jason stepped forward and looked out across the sandy waste. He saw someone. It was a body simply laying in the sand near a large rock.
"There's someone over there," announced the tall fox. "Might be a corpse."
"Might be a trap," said Lewd Ideas Kangaroo. "Want me to run up and kick the shit out of it?"
"No," replied Jason. "Wait here. I'll deal with it."
Eager Ears Fennec turned to her team as the fox walked away. "Lewd, escort Glutton around the area so he can look for a door. Right now, we just need to get out of Zed, and then we can use the CI [Cartographer's Initiative] to find our way back to Hedon."
"Let's get moving, bucko," said Lewd Ideas.
"So hungry," the rat complained as he walked.
"I swear to Maximus, I'm gonna fist Stinky so hard in his asshole if I find him," grumbled Kinky Fix Raccoon. "And I hope it fucking hurts him."
"Kinky, shut up," ordered Eager Ears.
Jason stepped up to the body. It was a donkey with curly hair. He was lying face down on the ground in a disheveled manner as if he had fallen from a great height. There was blood running out from his hip. Jason crouched down and rolled the body over. The donkey's eyes were open. To the fox's surprise, they blinked.
"You're alive," said Jason.
"I am?" queried the donkey groggily.
Jason checked the donkey's injury. "You've been shot in the hip. The wound is healing quickly though. You're only bleeding a little bit."
"Well, you don't see that every day." The words were a little confusing to Jason, but he chose to ignore them at present. The fox then tore a strip of the donkey's shirt off and used it to bandage the wound.
"What's your name?" asked Jason.
"Cornelius," replied the donkey. "Are you sure I'm not dead?"
"Not only are you not dead, you can probably stand up and walk. You're gonna have a limp though."
"That's fair," grumbled the donkey.
The fox grabbed the donkey by his arm and pulled him up, keeping him steady. The two looked at one another for a moment. Cornelius appeared both confused and curious. "Who are you?" the donkey asked.
"I'm Jason."
"The fuck? You came all the way down here... to rescue me?"
"Down here?" Jason paused and then asked, "Cornelius, do you know where you are right now?"
"I... I don't know anything anymore. Just tell me where I am, and that'll probably be good enough."
"You're in a place called Zed. It's a very dangerous place. I need you to come with me and my friends so we can get you out of here."
The donkey suddenly reached up and pulled off Jason's sunglasses. Although somewhat annoyed, the fox allowed it to happen. The two gazed into each other's eyes. Cornelius asked, "You... don't even... remember?"
"Remember what?"
To this, there was no answer. Jason held out his hand, and Cornelius returned the fox his sunglasses. After placing them back over his eyes, the fox heard a call from Eager Ears Fennec.
"We found one!" she cried from afar.
Jason waved to her and then held Cornelius by his arm. "We have to go. I'll keep you steady. Just do the best you can, okay?"
The dazed and confused donkey returned, "Sure, I guess so. Whatever, man."
The donkey limped forward the best that he could. Jason stayed by his side the entire way. Soon another strange sight as seen. A door. A floating door with a light shining through it. Eager Ears Fennec shouted, "Everyone, go through!" Cornelius watched as all the strange little people followed this order.
"What the fuck is that?" muttered the limping donkey. "What's even going on?"
"Don't think about it," said Jason. "Just go through."
Jason and Cornelius were the last to pass through the door. After they were gone, the door swung shut, locked itself, and disappeared from reality altogether. Nothing was left but sand.
