Tuesday, October 23, 2018

My Best Friend... Anthony

Oh! How I have been looking forward to writing this blog. I met the coolest person ever. His name is Anthony and he is a bat. Not only is he a bat, but he is a charming bat. At first, I was a little put off by him, but after just one conversation with him, I just... I don't know how to explain it! I just wanna do whatever I can for him!

So I was hanging out on floor 59 in Railroad Towers waiting for a friend. That's when I ran into him, or... rather... he ran into me. I'm usually extremely antisocial. But it was the way he said, "Hey, there," that sort of got me out of my box.

"Hi," I said to him. "I'm Ɉ̵̞͓͖͈͎̼̮̮̄͌̈́̉͑̈́̉̓́̕ɘ̶̡̡̫̗͚͇̱̝̉͑͌̏̅͠ͅͅq̶̱͈̝͔͈̝̪͙͔͍̈́̋͋̒͘q̷̰̞̗̦̫̏̿̾̅͂̀͊͘͠͠ḭ̷̢̡͉͎̘̹̦̝́̈̓̈͑̂͊̾T̸̨̰͔͖̲̊̈̍̄̓͛͜͜͝ ̴̲̇͐γ̴͈͇̘̤͔͕̠͙̒̆͊͝b̷͍͚͚̱̮̘̙̠̠͗͛̔̋͋́̿͐̃̕͜b̶͕̣̫̹̺͗̈̐̍͠υ̵̢̢̤̰̣͓̩̙͆̏͗́̐̓́̽͠͝ઘ̶̗̞̟̹̊̔͗̕͜ͅ. I was just waiting for my friend."

"It doesn't look like it to me," said the bat. Suddenly, I realized that he was right! Wow! Apparently I was just standing there for no reason! I immediately apologized for being an idiot.


"That's fine. My name is Anthony, by the way."

"Hi, Anthony," I said with a silly smile.

"Did you know that you really are an idiot?"

"I am?"

"Yes, you are. You have an IQ of about 30. Did you know that?"

"No, I didn't. But I do now. Wow, I'm stupid."

He then asked me, "Did you know what stupid people are good for?"

"What's that?"

"Sucking my dick whenever I need them to."


It made sense, I thought. I mean... if I was really that stupid, I ought to be sucking his dick. I've been sucking it on and off while I've been writing this. It's funny how life can sometimes seem like it's going one way and then you realize that it's really completely different. Who knew I was a cock-sucking idiot this whole time?!

Oh, apparently Anthony just told me that he's been hypnotizing me since we met. He was trying to ruin my life because that gives him kicks. But that's okay because I'm too stupid to care! Haha! Wow. I'm really that stupid!

Anyways, I gotta get off this thing. Anthony wants to throw me out the window. But before I go, why not check out the book I wrote back before I knew I was stupid. It's called "Pack Rats of The Inside." ... I think. Anyways, here is some information:

$9.99 - Paperback Edition
$5.99 - Kindle Edition

Click here to see the Amazon.com listing.

4 comments:

  1. That is typical of evil: Convince people they are useless then make use of them.

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    1. What are you talking abut? Anthony isn't evil. He's my best friend! All the pain I feel must be about something unrelated.

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  2. I feel obliged to warn you that Anthony drains the life out of everyone he meets, and does so without remorse. If that sort of thing is your thing then by all means enjoy your life of servitude as his footstool. Otherwise RUN!!

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    Replies
    1. Oh, no. Don't worry. Anthony informed me that everything you said is not true. Also legs not work anymore. So it's fine!

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